Your child eats what you eat

5,4,3,2,1 - Let's fly!

Today hasn't been too bad at all. Despite the second day of the conference being rather boring and most, if not all of us delegates declared it as a 'steaming pile of dog turd', I'm feeling quite positive as my counsellor replied to my email, apologising and saying she thought I was on holiday this week, not next week. It's really hammered home to me how much I depend on talking to her at the moment, especially at the moment, with everything going on in my head. 

As usual, my Boyfriend was amazing and just let me cry last night when I was upset, however it's nice to be able to say what I feel, without the worry of being judged or run the risk of saying something that affects my relationship. 

I'm getting more 'OK' about being pregnant as it's now been 8 days since I found out. I'm also thinking that this is my pregnancy, not anyone elses - therefore if I don't want it to be all sunshine and flowers and 'happy' stuff, then I don't have to feel like that. As long as I do the best I can and also don't force myself to do things I'm not happy about doing (like a vaginal birth), then sod anyone else judging me. One thing that I did see today was this advert which basically seems to be saying that you could harm your baby if you've got a poor diet.

It made me really anxious and in some ways quite trapped - after all, what if I fancy a burger in a couple of days? What if I fancy drinking a can of diet coke every so often? I can appreciate if you only ate junk food then there may be vitamin and mineral deficiencies, but every so often? Hrmmm... 

However, as I am really paranoid and anxious about what I'm eating at the moment so seeing adverts like that aren't really helping. 

Today I had a slice of malt loaf for breakfast and as I was still at the conference, I had 3 mini sandwiches and some crisps for lunch. We had 2 coffee breaks and whilst I steered clear of the coffee / tea, I did munch on a biscuit on each break. Thankfully I was able to leave by 4:00pm, so I got back just after 5 and set to work on packing my suitcase and sorting things out for my holiday to Mexico tomorrow. I also started on dinner as tonight my Boyfriend has come round, ready to watch The Great British Bake Off! Tonight we had a marinated BBQ chicken breast with rosemary roasted potatoes and a LOT of veg. It looks a lot of food, but I think I tend to eat my main meal in the evening as it gives me 'something to look forward to' throughout the day.

It was rather nice, however as I was steaming the veg, the broccoli was rather 'al dente' as I totally forgot that the veg at the top of the steamer doesn't cook as quickly! Ah well, no harm done :-)

I'm flying to Mexico tomorrow and whilst I'm going to try and relax, I want to still write some blog post as I think it's helpful for me to think about how my mood is doing and also, what I'm eating. 

Stay tuned for a lot of weird Mexican food in the next 10 days! :-)

Healthy eating is helping me be busy, but happy!

I can't believe it's already Thursday

Looking back 3 months ago and I was dreading getting up each day when I knew I had to go into the office. I've not been in my new job for 2 weeks and I'm really excited about undertaking new things, learning stuff and basically working with nice people. Yesterday was a great day - Went into the office which was easy as the tube strike had been called off. 

One thing I did realise is that I've been charged something crazy like £16 a day to travel just in Zone 1 as I'm getting off the train and going through a barrier with my oyster card and then leaving after my journey.. it seems to think I'm 'touching out' of the station and then 'touching out' of the tube station but not touching in anywhere... I honestly didn't think I was that bad with certain technology, but maybe I am? Either way, it's cost me a fortune these last 2 weeks so I'm going to try a different route tomorrow and see if Oyster can work out what I'm doing!

Breakfast yesterday was a slice of malt loaf and a banana - I'd say it was the same as today, except I've run out of bananas! Lunch was a ready made Japanese 'Teryaki chicken' rice salad as my ex-management coach came to my office to say hello. He'd never heard of the company before but was looking for a dowdy building in the City... I think he was rather impressed when he saw a gleaming, glass skyscraper ;-) It was really lovely to see him and we caught up on what each other has been doing. He even gave me some more suggestions about how to further my career and what to do in my new company which is lovely, considering usually my ex-company had to pay him £££ an hour for this kind of support. 

My mid-afternoon snack was a packet of Sainsburys mango which I have always loved. I've tried a lot of different types of mango but this one is just brilliant - I swear they must lave it with cocaine or something as it's really sweet, but very easy to eat. I've been buying the 35g packets so I don't overeat as the 100g packets would be gone in one sitting, easily! 

After getting home last night I started cooking for myself and my boyfriend and it was another Marks and Spencers chicken dish - this time it was M& S lime leaf and coconut chicken escalopes which I served with rosemary roasted baby potatoes, steamed brocoli and carrots. It was absolutely gorgeous and I'd certainly try that chicken again - it wouldn't be out of place served with rice, to be honest.. although there's sauce, I don't think there's enough to make it a proper 'curry', but the flavours are lovely. 

My boyfriend had kindly picked up my antique bookcase that we tried to get in the car at the weekend but it was too big to fit in his Audi by 2cm... 2cm!! so annoying! So he borrowed his work van and very kindly picked it up for me. It's a rather large glass bookcase, but for £30, it's brilliant and will be perfect for storing DVD's out of the way so they don't get covered in dust. After we dropped the work van off and picked up his car, we decided to head to the pub for a quick drink. After my 1.5 weeks of healthy eating, I was keen not to get drunk and then get the munchies, but really fancied a nice glass of red wine - so thought 'Sod it'... I had the glass of wine... and I DIDN'T get any munchies whatsoever... My willpower is quite high at the moment.

Today I'm working from home and lunch will be a lovely baked sweet potato with beans. I need to go food shopping at some point today, however the company seems to have a lot of phone meetings over lunch time (very different culture to my old company) so might have to make it 'late night' shopping, instead! 

I'm really looking forward to the Bank Holiday weekend and also to finishing my 2nd week in my new job - Who knows what interesting (and healthy!) food, I can find in the canteen tomorrow? :-)

Let's make the next 3 weeks count

3 weeks today, it will be the first day of my new job

This also means that it will be 3 weeks until I wear a suit - Something I've not done for a while (I didn't even do it when I had the interview for this job!). As my lovely friend was kind enough to donate a number of suits to me yesterday, I'd really prefer to wear them, rather than having to buy a lot of new things - especially if I'm looking to lose more weight in the next few months, which I am. 

However - some of the suit trousers are pretty tight and the jackets are also tight... I could wear them, but they'd be rather uncomfortable. I don't know if I change that within 3 weeks, but I guess you never know unless you try? At any rate.. losing half a stone would hopefully take off the additional weight I've gained within the last week or so by eating crap and get me right back onto it. I don't know how much I've put on, I guess in the grand scheme of things it doesn't matter - what matters is I start eating healthily again and look at the long term goals.

Which is exactly what I've been doing today! I didn't know how I'd feel when I woke up, however I woke up feeling like an adventure and that I really wanted to get back to my healthy eating. I was planning on driving to Leeds Castle, however after 1.5 hours of driving on the M25, my Sat Nav was showing quite a few queues towards the Castle, so I decided I'd head towards Canterbury and visit the Cathedral - something I'd never done before. 

Another thing I've not done for a while is not eat breakfast. However I woke up and genuinely just didn't feel hungry. I think after the weekend of Pizza and chips and crap, I just wanted a bit of a rest from eating... so I actually managed to make it to Canterbury before my stomach even started rumbling. I parked in a really small car park quite easily and managed to navigate to the centre without too much trouble. Not bad considering I get really anxious about driving places I've never driven before :-)

Even though it was midday, I still wasn't overly hungry so I decided to go carb-light for once and get some food from Marks and Spencers that I could easily eat. BBQ chicken, eggs and a few leaves of spinach. I felt quite full afterwards! I grabbed a cup of tea from a nearby Cafe and headed to the Cathedral which was beautiful. It cost £10.50 to go inside and I spent a good 1.5 hours in there, going into the crypt, exploring the stained glass exhibition... I love Churches and Cathedrals at the best of times but Canterbury Cathedral was stunning. I felt really relaxed walking around and the fact I've got another 3 weeks before I go to work is just... brilliant. 

After the Cathedral, I spent an hour wandering around the shops and decided I'd go on a boat ride - despite being on my own, it didn't feel weird at all and I spoke to the bloke who was rowing everyone around about the fact he used to be an I.T. Recruiter and shared war stories :-) 

I loved Canterbury and did a lot of walking - even the drive home wasn't too traumatic as despite it being rush hour, there wasn't many slow downs or problems on any of the motorways. I'm now back, having eaten a packet of ham hock from Marks and Spencers and am wondering what to do with the rest of my evening. I'm not hungry at all, but appreciate I've not eaten very much at all and I really don't want to start any fads.

I think I might go shopping tonight and buy some healthy things to eat for the next couple of days, however based on the fact I'm quite a few stone overweight and I'm not planning on continuing my low calorie / low carb eating, I'll have a bath and an early night. Tomorrow is the most exciting thing ever... Smear Test - URGH :-S

Back to normal?

Today has been probably one of the most busy-but-boring days I’ve had in a while.

Busy, because my lovely work colleague is still off and therefore I’m currently holding the fort in her areas as well, however boring because nothing bad happened at work, my Boss wasn’t in, the woman (I believe) he’s sleeping with wasn’t in and as such, the atmosphere was rather, well… calm. It made me question my desire to leave - There are lots of nice people in the company, it's a short commute, I've got a really good work / life balance.... However I then reminded myself that sadly it's not 'normally' like this and I spend most of my days very anxious about what's going to happen next.

I also got positive feedback from the Recruiter about my interview yesterday and the company have confirmed they’d like me in again – Crikey.. I actually felt my stomach tighten slightly when I read it as I’m a bit more invested with the company and the idea of working for them. Ahh well, let’s see what the next couple of weeks hold, eh?

My period is definitely just around the corner and usually 2-3 days beforehand I’m fighting off cravings to eat more than usual and that ‘more’ being chocolate and anything fatty that tastes nice. Oddly, I don’t feel like that at the moment so I don’t know if it’s because I’ve been healthy eating for a while now, or if I’m just trying harder to listen to what my body wants, but either way.. I’m feeling more, ‘in control’ I guess.

Breakfast was, well.. why don’t you guess? :-) Porridge, of course whilst lunch was the sushi I didn’t eat yesterday. Even though I had my food in the fridge, I still went into town as had to pick up the ingredients to make the healthy fajitas for my friend coming over to my house after work as well as pay a cheque into the bank and purchase some stamps and buy the birds some more bird food.  

At the moment, all I seem to be doing is buying the little feathered tweeting things food – I thought they weren’t supposed to need as much food in the summer as there were more bugs to eat, however all of them sit in my back garden, on my fence in the morning, waiting for me to feed them with bird seed, fat balls and tasty sunflower seeds like they are in some kind of mafia.

Fajitas were lovingly provided by the Spicery - the present my sister got me for Christmas that just keeps giving :-) 

It was really nice seeing my friend this evening, she looks so amazing now - over 7.5 stone lost! When I told her that I'd lost 8.5 lbs and my main goal was to wear size 14 jeans by Christmas, she was really supportive and told me that she had bought some size 14 clothes! I have to say, there was a slight green eyed monster, however 99.9% of me was just really chuffed for her as despite what people say, I don't think the gastric bypass is an 'easy' choice and she made the right choice for her. 

We had a massive catch up and watched amazing television stored on my Sky planner such as 'Virgin coaches' (where Christians in America wait until their wedding night to have sex, therefore go to a sex retreat to talk about things, so it's not as much of a shock) and 'Sex Clinic' where people in London have had unprotected sex and the copious amounts of diseases they are tested for.... Exciting times!

Tomorrow I'm heading 3 hours 'Up North' to this work thing - I'm not overly looking forward to it, but it does mean I'm out the office, so it's not all bad :-)

Road Trip

I love being on holiday

Today marks the first of three days that I'm on holiday and already I'm feeling calmer, happier and more positive.

Not having to set an alarm and waking up naturally was bliss and I managed to sleep for over 8 hours, only finally leaving my comfy and warm bed after 9am. Had a shower, washed my hair (an operation that always needs to be planned as it's so thick and long) and started packing my suitcase, ready to take to Northumberland later on tonight. Before 10:00am, I'd already received 2 phone calls from recruiters which I was quite chuffed about - even if they don't come to fruition, it's nice to get some positive feedback that maybe you're not as useless that you've come to believe.

Breakfast was a lovely cup of jasmine tea and porridge with blueberries, although I actually tried a 'Honey and Vanilla' pot, rather than my usual 'Golden Syrup'. It was OK, however I now know why there's usually a big hole on the supermarket shelf regarding the Golden Syrup pots and everything else is still there - Not sure I'd try it again to be honest.

Sitting on the sofa, I decided to add a couple more recipes to my website and proudly update how much weight I've lost so far. I also did the fun task of paying my gas and electricity bill (I just don't trust them with a Direct Debit so phone them up once every 3 months with my debit card) and watch some South Park episodes that I had on my Sky Planner. 

Lunch was a rather nice pot of butternut squash risotto - I actually forgot I bought it last weekend, so decided to use it up, rather than it go to waste. It's surprisingly filling and very quick to heat up if you're on the move. 

I then went out to 'prep' for the 6 hour journey up North - Usually we'd stop off at a service station, maybe partake in a Burger King or MacDonalds on the way up for dinner.... I'd rather not do that so went to Tescos to find some more healthy food and bring it with me. On my travels, I picked up more blueberries, some pita bread, chicken, salad etc - I'll make a really nice chicken salad sandwich and polish it off with some strawberries for 'pudding' which I think will be a lot healthier and better for me than fast food.

Next stop.... Northumberland!

Easter... at the end of May?

I never thought that I'd be given an Easter Egg today...

After this mornings 'disappointment' with my car, the day got much better - especially after I emailed my boyfriend a picture of my pathetic exhaust pipe and he suggested you can buy 'bolt ons' which I assume are the treasured possession of a lot of teenage boy racers?  So, on Saturday we will take a trip to Halfords and hopefully make my car look like it did before 'exhaust-gate' happened.

Having left work at 5:00pm, I travelled to Twickenham to see my friend - well, she's kind of my sisters friend, however I'm getting to know her a lot better and she's an amazing woman. She's also a very talented eyelash technician who has done eyelashes for models, actresses and travels all around London making people have longer eyelashes. 

I've had it done about 5 times, I believe - The first time they were way too long and I ended up taking them out less than 24 hours after I had them done. It was a total waste of money and I thought I'd never do it again, however my sister convinced me to try again and ask them to be a lot shorter (8's and 9's apparently... which is the length in mm) and I LOVED them. 

Due to having twice as much hair as 'normal' white people (as evidenced by my

afro-hair and the need to get it chemically straightened every 3 months) turns out, I also have twice as many eyelashes! This means they look really full, but it takes my poor friend 2 hours to stick the fake ones on. Thankfully we had a good catch up as I haven't seen her for over 4 months and the time went really quickly.

Upon leaving, I noticed she had an Easter egg on her living room shelf and announced 'Lesley, you're a better woman than me... you've managed to have so much willpower, you've still got Easter Eggs left!' to which she replied,'No, it's not me being good, I just hate dark chocolate - do you like dark chocolate? have it, have it!' I'm perfectly happy eating dark chocolate, white chocolate or any chocolate to be honest, however it feel as if temptation had just jumped 100 feet in the air saying 'EAT THIS EGG' which I thought was quite funny.

I did take, as I didn't want to be rude, however it's already left my house again and is now happily residing with my partner - He lives very close to me and is very supportive over my healthy eating, so had no issue 'adopting' the chocolate. This is the perfect solution as whilst I'm motivated at the moment, I'd rather not have a huge chocolate egg in the house as I'll be so concious it's there and the slightest 'down' moment, and I might reach for it - Why put yourself in that position?

Dinner? Well, it was a rather rushed roast chicken slices and the M&S egg and spinach pot, which apparently has been available in PRET for a while (M&S... ripping off coffee shops... shame on you!) Once I'd left my friends house, I quickly ate it in the car, before driving the hour back home and arrived back at 9:00pm.

I'm now drinking a cup of green tea, watching the Big Bang Theory, trying to work out when to book my super-exciting-fun cervical smear test, as I received a lovely reminder letter, telling me it's been 3 years since a nurse investigated the cavern down below. May as well get it over and done with, so I'm going to sort it out tomorrow - I can't say I'm keen on them, but I do believe they're a necessary evil and I'm grateful that I live in a country which takes cervical cancer seriously.

So excited that it's Friday tomorrow - My organic box of Vegetables from Riverford should be delivered tomorrow morning, so it will be fun finding out what new and weird fruit and vegetables are included this week..... 

Who's looking at you, kid? :-)

Healthy 'KFC' wrap

One of the best healthy 'makeover' recipes I've ever done

If you love fried chicken and are partial to a KFC but less partial to the calories and fat that it contains, look no further. This recipe is easy, relatively quick and incredibly tasty - Did I mention it was also rather healthy? :-)

Ingredients - serves 4

150 ml (1/4 of a pint) buttermilk

2 garlic cloves, crushed

4 x skinless, boneless chicken breasts

1 bag of salad or suitable salad bits

80g of cheese

4 large tortilla wraps

100g Panko breadcrumbs

2 tbsp self raising flour

1 tbsp paprika

1/2 tsp English mustard powder

1/2 tsp Thyme

1/2 tsp hot chilli powder

1/2 tsp ground black pepper

3 tbsp rapeseed oil

                                             Method

1. Pour buttermilk into a bowl and stir in the garlic. Slice the chicken into slices and lay chicken into buttermilk. If possible, marinade over night, but at least for one hour in the fridge.

2. In another bowl, add the breadcrumbs, flour, mustard powder, thyme, chilli powder and black pepper and mix.

3. Heat a large non-stick frying pan with the rapeseed oil and then add the breadcrumb mix. Toast for about 3-4 minutes until they start to go golden.

4. Tip the crumb mix back into the bowl it came from. Take the chicken from the fridge and coat the chicken in the breadcrumb mix. Place on a baking sheet.

5. Heat the oven to 210 C for a fan oven / 230 C for a non fan oven (Gas 8) and bake for 15 minutes.

6. Prepare the wraps - place one on each plate, add some salad and grate 20g of cheese over each.

7. Once the chicken is done, divide chicken equally between the wraps and hey presto - the most amazing and tasty KFC wrap!

Love chicken? Then you should LOVE chickens

For me, eating healthy means putting the best food I can afford into my body

If you're not a vegetarian, to get protein into your diet most people turn towards meat, with fish and chicken being obvious choices due to them being so low in fat.

I love chicken - I mean, I really do love chickens. One of the things I've always

wanted to do on my bucket list was 'Hatch chickens from eggs' and a few years ago, that's exactly what my boyfriend and I did (He's very supportive over my crazy schemes). We actually bought an incubator and some eggs from eBay and hatched our very own chickens - not once, not twice, but actually 4 times! 

It was amazing - seeing chickens emerge from an egg and watching as they got dry, stood up on their feet for the first time ever and started pecking at the chick crumb and cheeping. We kept them for 6-8 weeks, watching them grow and develop before we gave them to one of my work colleagues who has a lot of land and who promised to look after them even if they were cockerels (we agreed this before they hatched!). 

Hatching chickens gave me a deeper appreciation of them and as such, I never want to eat chickens who have been hatched, crowded into small spaces and never even seen the sunlight, let alone outdoors. Although the UK offers a lot of free range chicken in their supermarkets - a lot isn't free range and in America, the vast majority of chickens are grown in confinement buildings, with feed, water and air piped in. These chickens never see sunshine, much less fresh grass.

What does free range mean?

The definition is: Free range denotes a method of farming husbandry where the animals, for at least part of the day, can roam freely outdoors, rather than being confined in an enclosure for 24 hours each day.

I don't eat as much chicken as I used to and actually substitute Quorn or eat more vegetables than I used to, however when I do eat chicken, I want to make sure the chicken has the best life they can possibly have.

How? 

I check that all the chicken I buy has one of the following:

Soil Association Logo: This means that the Organic chickens and turkeys are able to behave naturally - grazing, pecking the ground, scratching and dust-bathing - http://www.soilassociation.org/whatisorganic/organicanimals/poultry

RSPB Freedom Foods Logo - This means the chickens are free from a number of things such as hunger, disease, pain, discomfort, fear and other things detrimental to them. 

http://www.freedomfood.co.uk/industry/media/34115/rspca_welfare_standards_for_chickens___november_2013_web.pdf

Assured Food Standards - This means the birds have access to food, water and warmth which encourages them to express their natural behaviour.

http://www.redtractor.org.uk/meet-olly-coles-redtractor-chicken-farmer

I know it's more expensive and I appreciate not everyone can afford to spend additional money on food, however for me, it's really important, not just from the moral perspective, but also because I want to put the very best food I can in my body. 

What would you rather? eat a chicken who's never seen the light? never been free to roam? 

Or a chicken who's had a good quality of life and as such, is healthier and happier?

The choice is yours.