Eating healthily when you're mentally struggling

I'm still trying to get my head around the last few days

So, I'm still pregnant and I'm still upset / worried / anxious, however not as much as yesterday.

Friday was pretty good - I actually managed to get some sleep on Thursday night. I was working in the office in London so I grabbed some malt loaf from my kitchen and for breakfast had a small cup of tea and malt loaf. I don't know if people cut caffeine out completely, however I've cut down to 2 cups a day, which I don't think is too bad - especially as I don't drink coffee and am not drinking any Cherry Pepsi Max at all at the moment.

Work was pretty OK, the stuff I've been asked to do isn't hard, however as I'm currently sat on a bank of desks on my own (there aren't enough desks to go round so some of us have to hot desk) I was feeling a bit lonely when other members of the team were talking to each other and I was sat on my own - They didn't mean it maliciously at all (as they offered me coffee / tea whenever they were making any) but I think at the moment I'm just craving human contact. As such, for lunch I decided that rather than go to the work canteen, I'd get some fresh air and retraced the journey that my colleague had shown me last week and went to the Japanese kitchen. I wasn't feeling too adventurous, so just opted for the same as last time - Salmon donburi with brown rice and puy lentils with a side order of chilli squid.

It tasted absolutely lovely, however it was too much food so I didn't manage to eat it all which isn't usually a problem, however my company don't have 'normal' bins, so you are forced to divide everything up into food waste / paper / packaging recycling... which meant I had to tip the uneaten food into one and the packaging into another!

After work, I headed straight back on the train, got into my car and drove to meet my Gastric Bypass Friend which was lovely as I hadn't seen her for a couple of weeks. We were going to go to Wagamamas, however it was actually really busy, so in the end we went to Strada instead. As I'd read that you're supposed to get loads of iron in your diet when you're pregnant, I decided I'd eat a steak - It was lovely :-) No pudding or anything else in the restaurant, however afterwards we went to a bar to get a drink and I got a pineapple mocktail. Yum! 

Then things went slightly downhill as I was driving back home as all the 'bad' thoughts started entering my head.... How was I going to cope with sleepless nights? How could I cope with losing my friends as none of them have children? (and that's what seems to happen) how can I deal with actually being a 'Mother'.. is my relationship going to survive? I felt totally desperate and ended up phoning my boyfriend and telling him I was thinking of having a termination. He was lovely, we just talked and he said that it was entirely my decision.... I love the fact he doesn't try and pressure me into anything...

This morning I felt a bit better, but still 'sad'. and then I felt guilty for feeling sad and worried as surely everyone's happy when they find out they're pregnant? Especially if they've been trying for it to happen? My boyfriend picked me up at 09:00 and we went to Marks and Spencers to get some breakfast and to buy some clothes to Mexico as we're off on Thursday! In the Cafe I felt really, really teary and deliberately didn't walk through the baby section as we were walking there.... I ordered a 'smoked salmon and egg bloomer' and decided on some orange juice as I'd already had a cup of tea in the morning.. It was really nice, however it felt weird that the bread wasn't toasted.

After M&S, we headed down to Wiltshire to see my Dad - something I was feeling a bit anxious about after 'text-gate', however it actually went really well, far better than I expected. We went to a farm shop and then across the road to a pub which was lovely. For lunch I had a cheese ploughman's, however only ate one slice of the bread and half of the cheese as it was literally a massive chunk as big as my hand!Too much cheese and bread for me :-(

After lunch, we headed back home and my Dad drove us in his 4x4 to a place I used to go as a child and as it was a lovely day, it was really nice to just remember all the happy times that I used to have with my sisters, Granny and Aunt. All in all, it was a lovely day and spending 4 hours with my Father is the longest I've spent with him for ages.... He didn't say anything horrible, I didn't either... it was just nice.

My boyfriend and I are now at home (my house tonight) watching 'Last Night of the proms' and he's sat on the sofa whilst I'm blogging :-) For dinner we had more steak (I think that's enough red meat for a while) with spinach, home made cajun sweet potato chips and steamed carrots. It was absolutely lovely, but I struggled to eat the steak so gave 1/3rd of it to my boyfriend :-)

At the moment I'm feeling OK - I still have time to decide what to do and visiting the midwife on Thursday really helped. I also think my head is finally getting used to the idea, however the worries, anxieties and unhappiness haven't subsided, I'm trying to take one day at a time, but it's just very hard as that's not usually me.

On Monday night I'm seeing two of my sisters and I'm really looking forward to that - they're always very supportive and I know they'll help me to figure things out.

I am a great food smuggler :-)

Today has been a really fun Saturday

I always find it funny when I look forward to the weekend thinking I'll get a lie in, and I end up waking up pretty much the same time as I would, on a weekday! After getting up I decided to do a spot of early morning food shopping so I could ensure I had some healthy food for today as I went to the Rewind Festival with my friend and her friends. I had a bit of a conundrum in regards to what to buy for lunch as what food can cope with being in a hot handbag for a few hours and not go off? In the end, I decided to buy a salad with extra ham from Marks and Spencers and just eat it as soon as I got there!

I bought some strawberries from Tescos and had a really nice breakfast with them and a banana :-) I also followed that up with a slice of malt loaf an hour and a half later, so was trying to eat little and often.

I arrived at Rewind at 12:00 and met my friend and her friends in the queue. As we were walking to the gates, I remarked that I didn't have a camping chair to sit on, like them... however I did have some food. Then my friend told me - I wasn't allowed to bring food into the festival and it's one of the conditions.... Whoops! You can tell I'm not a regular festival goer :-) As we got closer to the security... I did indeed see them checking bags. Hrm... I was prepared to have to throw it away, however had recently bought a new handbag for work - one which has 2 main compartments in the middle. A quick readjustment and zipping one of them up, I tried my luck by only showing them one of the compartments... Guess what? It worked! Hurrah! I wandered past the security people feeling rather smug :-)

We wandered through the festival and found a really good place to sit, quite near the middle. We then went to find the toilets - one of my friend's friends had a slightly disability and as such, she bought 'posh toilet' passes - you pay additional money to go to very nice portaloos, rather than the usual type of toilets you get at festivals. Apparently she had bought one for each of us - I said that was cool and thanked her... and asked how much I owed her - £30.... Oh.. My.. God... £30! As I'm quintessentially British and in some ways, a bit of a pushover, I said that was fine... however guess what? I only used the toilet twice.. so that's basically £15 per toilet break.. really, really mental. Next year I think I'll be totally up front and say that I'll just use the normal toilets....

The festival was awesome - The weather was also really great until about 7:30pm when it started raining... However just to sit in the sun, chatting, listening to music.. it was great. I ate my salad and throughout the day, also ate my Nakd bar and some malt loaf so I didn't actually need to buy anything from any food stalls except water and a diet coke :-)

When my friends friends asked if I wanted anything, I politely declined - My friend said 'Imogen is very disciplined when it comes to healthy eating' which I thought was really nice.. I certainly don't feel very disciplined as if I was - I'd be a lot thinner than I currently am, however it felt nice that that's how she sees me.

We listened to Billy Ocean.. Hot Chocolate.. Belinda Carlisle... amongst others - Despite being born in the 80's I was actually surprised how little of their songs I knew! Still, it was great fun and loads of people dressed up in really awesome 80's costumes. I have to say, I've been to a few other types of festival - Reading Festival being the main one and the atmosphere is just so different... Rewind is just so 'relaxed' everyone is so nice and friendly whereas I find certain other festivals quite different - people throwing bottles of urine, glass in the crowds.. It's just not as pleasant and I can't relax as much.

I left before the main act as I'm still kinda getting used to work and felt quite tired, however noone minded. I'm now sat in my PJ's whilst my dinner is being cooked - turkey with baked small potatoes and steamed veg :-)

Enjoying the sun whilst it lasts

I am utterly knackered :-)

Breakfast: Oats so Simple Golden Syrup Porridge
Lunch: Marks and Spencers BBQ Chicken, Honey roast Ham, Chilli smoked salmon with a handful of plum tomatoes
Dinner: BBQ lamp chop with roast potatoes, steamed carrots and peas
Snacks: No snacks today :-)

Unfortunately I wasn't able to see my Drama friend last night. She had a meeting in London so was coming back on the tube - Severe delays meant she was out of contact and I had no idea what was happening. After waiting for her for an hour, I texted her a 'Hope you're OK mate - let me know' text and headed back home. Thankfully she was fine, just rather pissed off at being so late and not being able to tell me all her 'Goss'. I'm sure that will happen soon enough as we've arranged to see each other in a couple of weeks time.

Saturday has shaped up rather nicely so far - As I'm a numpty, I forgot to defrost one of my kippers and as such, had to eat porridge for breakfast. I'll be honest, I'm actually getting bored of porridge now - there, I said it, I am rather bored of porridge, so I'm going to really try and find other healthy things to eat in the morning. I don't think porridge will work for me in my new job as there's no kitchen - It's a massive glass skyscraper in London so it's very corporate.

After 'boring porridge', I logged onto the Riverford website and cancelled my subscription for the time being. Unfortunately the heat seems to be making the veg go off so quickly - After I got home last night, both the lettuce and greens were brown. The lettuce was brown and shrivelled and the greens were putrefying. I don't blame Riverford as they seem to genuinely want to provide quality to their customers, however as I've had to throw away two of the things and the rest are already looking like they'll go off within 24-48 hours, it's just not proving cost effective at the moment. I can't eat a whole box of veg within 2 days! It's a shame, but I'll look at re-starting in the Autumn, where the weather isn't as hot and I can make stews and more hearty soups.

It was another beautiful day today, so less clothes were needed. As it's the weekend, I don't need to wear a shirt and therefore the 'fat pants' don't usually make an appearance. Thing is, all my strappy tops are tight fitting and therefore if I don't wear fat pants, I have a tummy bulge. It's just my brain, but I really hate looking at myself when I don't have a flat stomach, I hate it - it's a massive 'thing' for me. I opted for a black strappy top and jeans, however I also put a light cardigan on as well - firstly, to cover the tops of my arms as I believe they are really, really fat and secondly, to provide me with some 'tummy cover' so I can wrap it around my middle when I sit down and it doesn't draw attention to my tyres. It's going to be so nice when I don't have to think like that, but it will take time to change how my body looks and also it will take time to change how my mind thinks about my body.

I know I don't look massive, but I don't look slim - and for me, that's important. My ideal is to be able to wear size 14 clothes and not have to suck my tummy in or wear additional clothes over the top of things as I feel self concious. I will never be a Super model and quite frankly, I don't actually want that - I'd just like to feel confident about what I wear. 

My Boyfriend picked me up at 11:00am and we headed to The Lavender Fields near Alton as they were having an open day, where you could go and wander around the fields and learn about 'All things Lavender'. We'd passed it before and I said I wanted to go, however my Boyfriend was less than enthused as he said it would just smell like 'Old Grannies' nevertheless, he relented and for £3, we ended up wandering around the Lavender fields and learning about all the different types. I never knew there were so many different ones - I thought there were maybe 2-3, but no... there are lots, lots more. 

It started getting rather hot, so after 45 minutes, we decided we'd head to the nearby Alton Farmers market, buy some lunch and then go to a National Trust property. We go to a lot of Farmers Markets and usually spot the same producers at different ones. This time, we bought some lamp chops for tonights dinner as well as some plum tomatoes and a rather large tomato for tonight. Unfortunately, there was nothing healthy that we could really eat for dinner - only pies, quiches, hog roast rolls... All incredibly tasty, but not something that either of us wanted to eat.

So unfortunately we ended up at an old faithful - Marks and Spencers... I would have done my usual, however being out and about, I wasn't able to cut up any peppers or cucumber and whilst M&S do sell 'crudities', despite me finding some pots on special offer, over 50% of the pots were filled with the Devils food - that's right.. celery :-( I have mentioned before how much I hate the stuff and I'm still refusing to eat anything I genuinely don't like in the quest to be more healthy, so nope.. I didn't buy it in the end. 

Lunch therefore consisted of a lot of meat - not the ideal for me, but low in both fat and calories and as long as it's not a typical lunch, I'm fine with it. I didn't just eat random meats, I also supplemented it with a large handful of plum tomatoes, so got some vitamins as well :-)

With lunch done, we headed more South and went to Petworth House, another National Trust property. Neither of us had been there before and were pleasantly impressed. It costs a fair whack if you're not National Trust members (£14.50 each) however you could certainly spend a good few hours wandering around both the house and the gardens if you chose to. We didn't know it - however there was also a fun fair in the grounds which had both classic cars and a dog show. There were also a lot of stalls to buy things from and do various tombolas etc - My Boyfriend likes cars, so we sat down and watched the end of the classic car show, where they all drove around in a circle whilst the chap with the microphone was telling us all about them.

The sun was beating down quite heavily so we didn't spend more than an hour outside as it was getting quite unbearable with no shade, so we headed back to the house, grabbed a drink from the cafe and started looking around the house. The house was huge and incredibly well presented. Both of us were like, 'WOW' when we went into a massive room absolutely full of paintings and not just any old paintings, but paintings by the very famous artist - J.M.W Turner. I can't say either of us are particularly art-inclined, however I think we can both appreciate talent and the paintings were absolutely beautiful.

However, no matter how amazing paintings are, I still think my heart will lie with antique furniture, so wandering around the house, looking at all the beautiful examples of various period furniture is something I've always enjoyed. Despite it being a Saturday, I think most people were outside enjoying the sun and the fair, so it was really quiet, bonus! After a good hour or so, we decided to head off, grab a few bits and bobs from Tescos on the way back and am now sat on the sofa, watching random TV.

In an hour, we're going to head to my Boyfriends house to BBQ the lamb chops we bought from the Farmers Market and enjoy an hour or two outside in his garden. Tomorrow I'm seeing my sister and 'the sprog' (My 2 year old niece) and I am sure her Idiot Husband will be there (another interesting individual I'll blog about when I have time). 

Staying motivated to eat healthy - didn't even eat an icecream today, despite the amazing weather!

I'm famous!!!!

So in the grand scheme of things, I'm saying 'famous', however I guess it's all about context :-)

I buy two magazines a month and have been buying the same magazines for over 3 years. I've got my BBC Good Food Magazine which is great for telling me when the latest food festivals are, what interesting food is out there to try and giving me some really interesting new recipes to try - However, the magazine doesn't focus on healthy food. There may be an article or a few pages devoted to low fat / low calorie / low carb recipes / gluten free recipes etc, however it's not a regular thing and whilst all recipes give you the calorie content, fat content and all the other usual contents, if you're trying to eat healthy, it's not the best magazine to support your goals.

I also get the 'Healthy Good Food Magazine'- half the size of the BBC Good Food magazine and not as much content, however it's purely focussed on eating healthy so every recipe you read about, is good for you and not laden in fat or calories. I like both magazines and tend to rip out any that I want to try and put them in my 'owl folder' - a massive lever-arch binder that has a picture of an owl on it (Classy, I know). Last month, when my magazines were delivered, I tweeted 'My new Healthy Good Food Guide has arrived!' - This month, when my magazine was delivered, I started reading it and... I'm in print! Wow! Check it out! :-) Form an orderly queue for autographs.....

Today has been pretty awesome. Firstly, My boyfriend and I went to an antiques auction which unfortunately meant we needed to get up at 7:00am - This was quite painful for me as I haven't been sleeping well recently, however the prospect of adding to my already crowded house was impetus enough to get up, have a shower and reacquaint myself with another kipper for breakfast. Mr Kipper shared the plate with some scrambled egg (made from the last egg I had left in the box) Whilst small, it was enough to keep me going for a while, healthy and also made a change from the last 5 days worth of porridge.

After we got to the auction and had a look round, I was rather disappointed. Nothing stood out and shouted 'Buy me! it doesn't matter that you've already got 5 Oak coffers in your two bedroom house, you *need* me as well'. That being said, I did find a golden mirror that looks pretty gothic and a small camphor wood chest which I thought might make friends with the two camphor wood chests I've already got in my house, so I did an absent bid and we headed off to another auction house before gong back home to grab some lunch.

In my vegetable box this week, Riverford had kindly given me broad beans. I haven't eaten broad beans in years and don't think I've ever cooked them before. When I first saw them, I was flummoxed as to what I could use them in, however Riverford had thoughtfully provided a few suggestions on a recipe card - One of them being 'broad bean dip'. I decided this was a good idea as it seemed like a different type of houmous and as we know.... I love houmous :-) It was really easy to make as well:

1. Grab loads of broad beans.

2. Shell aforesaid bean into a saucepan

3. Boil for approx 4 minutes.

4. Stick in colander and cool with cold water.

5. They'll look all wrinkly, so it's easy to pop them out of their harder, lighter green shell.

6. Once you've shelled them all. Place into blender.

7. Add a squirt of lemon juice, some cumin, some salt and one clove of garlic

8. Add some half fat creme fraiche to make it taste a bit richer and blend!

Done :-) 

I have to say, I thought I did rather well for a first attempt. After eating the lot of it, my mouth did taste quite strongly of garlic, but that's not necessarily a bad thing as I wasn't planning on going clubbing and kissing anyone! 

We headed off to Malborough for yet more antiques shops and after we'd wandered round them, we headed back home, at which point, I get an email from the auction house telling me that I'd won everything I'd bin on! Hurrah - God knows where I'm going to put things, however I'm sure I'll find a space and when I've got them back to my house, I'll take photos and proudly display them on my blog :-) 

Once we got home, we watched an episode of 'Kevin McCloud's escape to the wild' or as my Boyfriend likes to call him 'K-Dog' (If you've never read about the Grand Designs drinking game, you should Google it, it's really amusing) A bit of 'chill time' was really welcome before we embarked on the mammoth task of dinner - I say 'mammoth task', my dinner was incredibly easy to make as I'd decided I'd make sashimi.

If you have a COSTCO near you and like salmon - Go and investigate! My boyfriend found a 1Kg salmon for under £13 and the quality was stunning. I grabbed some from one end and cut it into strips, whilst frying a small top side steak I found reduced from Marks and Sepencers. I love my steak blue, so it took me approximately 3 minutes of effort to cook. Most effort came with making the sushi rice, which to be fair, just needed to be boiled for 12 minutes and then left with the lid on for 45 minutes and hey presto... Dinner was ready.

As it's been such a beautiful day, I suggested we eat dinner in my garden, sitting on a blanket. My boyfriend had cooked the rest of the salmon and as he's doing his Atkin-esque diet, decided to just eat that on its own with some salad cream. It looked nice, but for me, that type of eating wouldn't be sustainable and therefore we were very happy to help each other in the kitchen, but stick to our own meal plans.

It's been a lovely, lovely day and we're now going to head out for a quiet drink at a lovely pub and enjoy the nice weather. 

Happy Saturday everyone!

Even healthier Moussaka

You know it's going to be a good day when your fake dog poo arrives through the post.

I'm very lucky to have a really nice group of friends who accept me for me, despite all of my quirkiness and odd ways. One of my friends lives in Wales - we met at work, when I was an I.T. Consultant and she was a contractor working in the same place as me. We hit it off as she's got the same dirty sense of humour and 7 years later, we're still good friends, despite the 180 miles between us. She moved house in December and has had problems with her cat weeing inside - presumably due to the fact her cat is 19 years old and stressed over the house move. I suggested it was also due to her wanting to mark her territory? I'm heading over to Wales to see her in a couple of weeks and she said 'Oh! your room is nearly ready' (she's decorating her spare room with peacock wallpaper and she knows how much I like peacocks).

I thanked her, said I couldn't wait to see her and her new house and that I'd also want to 'mark my territory' in some random way. She said 'If you pee or crap anywhere, there will be trouble' ... I don't think she thought I was serious, so I'm sure she'll laugh when she sees the present I've left her on my pillow :-) (along with a thank you card and some chocolates for putting up with me for the weekend!).

This morning I woke up and lazed in bed for ages, which was bliss - I didn't feel tired for once and listening to the birds outside the window was just so nice. Breakfast was a very tasty kipper with 2 scrambled eggs and some dry-fried tomatoes with no extra oil in the pan. After breakfast, I went food shopping and bought some ingredients to compliment the vegetables I had delivered in my vegetable box yesterday - The main one being... Aubergine.

Aubergine - The Devils food, or so I have thought my entire life. It's along the same vein as marrows and courgettes: neither of which I have ever particularly liked. However, as it was in my kitchen, I decided I may as well try it for the first time in 20 years, so decided to make a healthy moussaka for dinner. As my friend was arriving at my house just after lunch, I also bought some 'low fat treats' and headed home to make a start on dinner. As I hadn't eaten breakfast until 10:00am, I thought I'd forgo lunch and just eat an early dinner as I was stuffed after my kipper, eggs and tomato.

It was lovely seeing my friend - She's my 'drama' friend. So many things seem to happen to her, most of them being dating / relationship issues. At the moment, she seems to be having issues with yet another man she's met off a dating site who she's slept with, but he announced he just wanted to be friends with her. So she's 'just being friends', (although holding hands and cuddling him apparently) however he's now being quite unresponsive and she recently found out he's dating someone else - Rather than let him go, she seems to be harassing him on text messages and doesn't seem to want to leave him alone :-S

We had a number of cups of tea and I offered her one of the Tescos chocolate and caramel bars I bought - Only 68 calories. I have to say, I was slightly underwhelmed. The actual bar is a good 1.5 inches shorted than the wrapper it's in, and so the box they all come in, is quite deceiving in size. They were... OK, however certainly nothing to write home about. Whilst we were chatting, talking and watching crazy documentaries, I got on with making my dinner and working out how to cut aubergine (which is surprisingly simple and even I was able to do it :-)).

We headed into town for an hour or so for a bit of a mooch - It was an interesting experience, I usually hate catching site of myself in clothing shop mirrors, however when I took a cursory glance, I thought 'OK, not bad... ' and I felt quite proud of the progress I've made over the last 6 weeks. However when we were sat in a show shop, I looked in the mirror and saw massive tyres of fat around my stomach and felt really self concious, immediately sitting up and trying to improve my appearance. Despite feeling self concious, I know that the only way to change what I see in the mirror is to keep focussed on my healthy eating and that's exactly what I plan to do.

My friend headed off just after 6pm and I tried my moussaka - I have to say, it was actually really quite tasty. As I've never cooked it before, I followed the BBC Good Food recipe for a lighter moussaka pretty closely, however I only used 2 aubergine, rather than 3 (and there was still lots left over) and also used fat free Greek yoghurt, rather than 2%. I think I had a pretty average sized portion as there was a lot left over and I've got two portions in the fridge (one for tomorrow and Monday) and I've frozen the others. 

I'm now sat on my sofa, looking forward to a nice long bath and a really nice lie in tomorrow as well - My other friend isn't arriving until 11:00am, so I'm thinking I'll have a shower, wash my hair and enjoy a quiet and peaceful morning :-)

Benefits of Coconut water - Are there any?

Considering I didn't have to do anything today, I have been incredibly productive so far

After an amazing nights sleep, I woke up to find myself incredibly stiff and achey - I think my Body was reacting to all the bending down and carrying things on Thursday afternoon. I actually woke really early, considering I didn't have to get up at any particular time and once awake, I find it almost impossible to get back to sleep so instead I made myself a cup of tea and read more of my book. It's actually really interesting - The Diet Myth: The Real Science Behind What We Eat, by Tim Spector. It's all about the microbes in your gut and where you're born in the world affects what microbes you have and how you react to different food. Hence why Greek people can eat loads of olive oil products and have a really low rate of heart disease, yet if UK or US people did it, it would increase as we've not been raised on the same diet. 

I'm only 40% of the way through on my Kindle, but it's really interesting and it's not pushing a particular diet at all. It's also discusses the latest fads 'Fat is bad for you', '5:2 diet is amazing' etc. It will be interesting to see what he concludes overall. 

Once up, I stripped and remade the bed and put my sheets in the washing machine before having a shower and undertaking the mammoth task of washing my very long hair. It's one of my sisters birthdays today, so I sent her a text (already sent her a card and gave her a present) wishing her Happy Birthday and then got on with the task in hand: Cooking and eating my kippers for breakfast. 

It's an odd thing, but how do you cook a kipper? I had no idea until I asked Google and found out it was incredibly simple - stick the kipper in a bowl of water, cover.. and leave for 5-6 minutes. Hey presto! Unfortunately Google failed to mention that the water (and subsequent kipper) will stink out your house for a good few hours afterwards, so I don't suggest eating them if you've got friends or family coming round, unless they love the smell of smoked fish :-) 

The kipper was nice, however it looked a bit sad on the plate, on its own, so I think I might eat my other one with some scrambled egg and maybe a grilled tomato. Either way, it was to have a break from porridge and know that what I was eating was healthy and good for me (and also very tasty). 

After that, I headed off to buy yet more bird food for the bird mafia that had settled both sides of my garden fence, silently judging me for the empty bird feeder and after that, I went to Sainsburys to grab some additional ingredients for tonight as I'm planning on using up some of the things in my cupboards and making spaghetti and meatballs. I actually think I did pretty well in not putting lots of random things into my trolley, however I did decide to try some coconut water and see if it as tasty as my Vegan friend suggested it was.

Apparently, coconut water:

• Is low in calories
• Aids in weight loss
• Gives you perfect skin
• Reduces blood pressure
• Is naturally fat & cholesterol free
• Has more potassium than four bananas
• Is super hydrating
• Solves Hangovers
• May be better at replacing lost fluids than a sports drink or water

According to a lot of people, it has a 'sweet, nutty taste', however having drunk it, I can't say I'm a massive fan as it actually reminds me slightly of the 'Cystitis powders' you have to mix with water and drink when you've got a bad case of cystitis.  Having read quite a few articles on it, the conclusion seems to be that the only proven benefits are to hydrate, reduce sodium, and add potassium to diets. There doesn't seem to be any proof it helps in weight loss and despite being high in sodium, it still contains sugar - and after all, sugar is sugar, so drinking a lot of it and thinking it will help you lose weight doesn't seem to make sense.

Additionally, most fruit and vegetables contain a lot of potassium and eating / drinking those will give you more benefits as they contain a number of other nutrients that coconut water doesn't. 

Unless you're a hardcore gym go-er or looking to replace essential electrolytes (potassium and sodium) lost during a high energy exercise session, there doesn't seem to be any proven studies to show that it can reduce or combat any diseases. 

I think I'll be sticking to water, or Cherry Pepsi Max for the time being :-)

Northumberland - Day 3

An Edinburgh Adventure beckons

Since we planned to visit my Boyfriend's parents, we knew we'd take advantage of the close proximity of Scotland and go up to Edinburgh for a day. I had booked a 1:30pm 'City of the dead' underground ghost walk so we planned the day around that, deciding to get up early and head up to Edinburgh for 10:00am so we could visit Holyrood House.

Thankfully there was minimal traffic between 8:30am and 10:00am on the A1 and the parking wasn't too bad either, therefore we were able to park right next to the Palace and head straight in. The wind was bitter and incredibly strong, so we were grateful to be inside the palace, looking around all the beautiful rooms and listening to the free audio guide we were given. Unlike Kensington Palace in London, there were numerous antiques and display cabinets full of beautiful curiosities and we spent a good hour walking around, before happening upon a ruined abbey.

Now I've never, ever been particularly bothered about marriage - relationships, yes, fine, but marriage? Not really fussed as I've always been financially independent and even if I had children, I wouldn't want that to stop. Saying that, if I ever was to get married, I've always said it would be a ruined abbey, or somewhere that's very Gothic, at about 7pm on a Summers evening - Oh, and I'd wear a black wedding dress and have blood red roses and white lilies in my bouquet :-) The ruined abbey at Holyrood house was beautiful and exactly what I'd want. Sadly my Boyfriend said he doubted we'd be able to get married there, so it remains a pipe dream!

After walking around the gold exhibit in the building opposite the House, we got back in the car and parked it in central Edinburgh, much closer to the Cathedral, where we were meeting our guide at 1:30pm. It was already midday and my stomach was rumbling like crazy and had started to hurt a little bit as I'd only had my obligatory porridge and blueberries for breakfast and as we got up rather early, that was devoured at 7:30, so a few hours previous...

Finding healthy food in a City you're unfamiliar with can be rather hard and after looking at the food court and only seeing 'Spud U like' as the option (the rest being pizza, KFC, Chinese food) we decided to Google 'Sushi in Edinburgh' and found a restaurant 10 minutes walk away called 'Tangs'. This was great, except it was up a steep hill, followed by over 100 steep steps, so by the time we had reached the top, and indeed, the restaurant, I was rather out of breath and ravenous - It certainly hammered home the point that I was not as fit as I have been in the past and should keep up my promise to exercise at least once a week in the gym.

Despite being really hungry, I think I ordered quite sensibly, opting for a couple of portions of nigiri and some salmon skin maki (my boyfriend had half of these) and I opted for chicken teriyaki with rice for my main dish. 

It tasted absolutely lovely, however I was mindful of the fact that the chicken had arrived with skin on it - Whilst it was really flavoursome, I made the decision to take it off, and give it to my Boyfriend who was only too happy to help :-) I didn't need the skin and it's the most fatty part of the chicken. After eating half of the sushi and the chicken teriakyi, I felt a lot less hungry, but still felt I could eat more, which is perfect, right? 

After a lovely lunch, we headed to the Cathedral to meet our guide, only for me to check my phone and realise that I'd booked the tour for Friday and today was Saturday! Whoops.... Thankfully the tour guide didn't mind at all and we were able to join in and get spooked. After a brief introduction as to why the Scottish wear tartan, we headed to the underground city and learnt about the poor people who had to live in incredibly squalid conditions if they couldn't afford any other lodging and about the ghosts of the people who have died down there. 

I can't say I saw anything supernatural, however the guide certainly made it entertaining and managed to scare a few of our group during her talk :-) 

Back out in the fresh air, we headed back to the car, past the beautiful cathedral, trying to avoid the rain and the wind (and failing miserably). We're now back in Northumberland, recovering from the wind and the copious amounts of walking we did today - over 10,000 steps, get in! Once we've had a nice cup of tea, we're off out for dinner and I hope I'll be able to continue my healthy eating for our last night in Northumberland.

West Berkshire BreweryTour

Today has been really nice and chilled

After breakfast, I picked my boyfriend up and we went on the West Berkshire Brewery Tour. It cost £12.50 each and only took 45 minutes to go round as it's not the biggest brewery in the world, however the tour also including a pint glass and three pints, which they were only too happy to serve you. I don't like beer, I never have, so settled for a diet coke instead, however my boyfriend was more than happy to indulge! It was interesting tasting the different types of malt that goes into beer - some tasted like Maltesers, whereas others were more like burnt toast and coffee. 

The tour was pretty cool and the bloke giving the tour obviously knew an awful lot about beer. We've been on quite a few brewery tours - Binghams Brewery, Wadworth 6x in Devizes in Wiltshire... About 5 in total, I think? I was the only woman in a group of about 15 men which was slightly odd, however I guess it's not the typical thing that women like to do? Shame really, as it's quite interesting :-)

Once we'd been round, we headed back to the bar and it was already 12:15, lunch time.

Thankfully I'd already planned ahead, I had half a pot of houmous left over from yesterday and some wholemeal pita bread, a pepper and another nakd bar. I'll be honest, it wasn't as tasty as usual and I think that was due to the fact that the houmous was in the car for an hour - it's quite impressive the difference in both taste and texture if you eat it straight from the fridge, versus when it's left in the car for over an hour - Don't think I'll be doing that again.....

After the tour, we headed back via Reading so stopped to get some petrol and got some fish to cook for tonight as we'd decided on how we were going to use the Riverford Vegetable box veg - Oven baked cod with crisp potatoes, wilted spinach with nutmeg and steamed carrots...Yummy. I also decided to stock up on a few essentials - More porridge and more nakd bars. The Bakewell tart one is quite hard to find, so I decided to make the most of the fact that they had a large number in, and bought have a box - Doesn't exactly look like the most balanced shopping list, however I do have a lot of fruit and vegetables at home and I now have enough porridge and snacks to take to Northumberland with me, so I don't have to give in to my partners Mother offering me cakes and sandwiches every 5 minutes.

After dropping the fish and other food stuffs at home, we headed out for a drink in a local pub - I'm trying to drink less diet coke and Pepsi Max (although it's still one of my vices I don't want to give up altogether, so am just drinking it in moderation) so actually ordered a mineral water instead.. 

I also think it's a bit silly to be mindful of the calories you're eating, but totally oblivious or not mindful of the ones you're drinking. Apparently there's 139 calories in a can of coke and 35g of sugar. I know 'pub coke' is different, however I still think I'd rather not drink a lot of it. Apparently you'd have to do a lot of exercise, just to burn off one can of the stuff.

It was nice sitting in the sun, having a chat - We don't usually do that, we're always doing one thing or another and to actually 'chill' and enjoy each others company was nice

Dinner tonight was a nice piece of cod with some lemon and pepper butter, with the organic carrots and spinach I had got from the Riverford Veg box, topped off with some thinly sliced potatoes which we boiled for 5 minutes, then put in the oven and roasted for 15 minutes with some groundnut oil and a little bit of salt - It was really nice.

We watched 'The Fast and the Furious 7', which I have to say, was pretty watchable if not ever so slightly unbelievable (they might be good, but driving a car across 3 buildings in Dubai? Hrm.... ) I thought they did a rather classy tribute at the end of the film to Paul Walker who sadly lost his life in a car crash. 

I'm now sat at home, watching 'The Woman in Black' on TV. I've got it on DVD as it's a Horror Movie and I'm rather partial to them, however it's on TV, it's not a bad movie and I'm happy to watch it whilst browsing eBay for more antiques :-)

7 lbs lost!

I'm such an impatient person - not sure I can change that fact AND change my lifestyle at the same time though :-)

Hello weekend! Today I slept in until 8:48am which is a miracle for me as usually I still wake up at about 7:00am, whether it's a week day or not. I think it had something to do with the annoying pigeon sat in a tree outside my bedroom window coo-ing at 5:00am this morning......

Either way, got up, had a shower - there's something really nice about getting out of the shower, all clean, knowing you aren't working today or tomorrow. Once again, the slim, shiny, square thing was looking at me 'Come on, step on me.. it's been a few days, you know you want to....' I said I wasn't going to step on the scales until the end of the month, so it's *nearly* there! 

I have to say, I was quite chuffed with the result.

9th May start weight 99.9Kg

30th May current weight 96.7Kg

This means I've lost 3.2Kg which is 7lbs, so half a stone! I'm really, really happy with that result and it's been achieved 95% through changing my diet as I've not been in the gym since I started my healthy eating, just been on a few long walks and some short ones. 

If I keep the same weight loss up:

End of June - 1 stone

End of July - 1.5 stone

End of August - 2 stone

End of September - 2.5 stone

End of October - 3 stone

End of November - 3.5 stone

End of December - 4 stone.

Wow... even just looking at what I could achieve by a mere 7lbs a month is awesome - even achieve HALF of that, should mean I'm able to fit into size 14 jeans by Christmas and I'm not changing that goal.... 

To celebrate I had..... exactly the same breakfast I would have had regardless of what the scales say. I'm not keen on the saying 'Don't reward yourself with food, you're not a dog', but I do agree with the sentiment, I don't want to treat myself with food and it's not a short term fix. 

Therefore breakfast was a nice cup of green tea (well jasmine tea really, as I honestly think plain green tea tastes like puddle water) and porridge. It's struck me that I should actually change my breakfasts on a weekend as I don't have an excuse that I need to 'grab and go', so once I'm back from my Northumberland Holiday next week, I'm going to focus on doing healthier breakfasts that aren't so 'ready-mealish' however as instant porridge is working for me at the moment and I enjoy it, I'm not going to beat myself up over it. 

Wearing my lovely new earrings I got from eBay, I'm now off to pick up my partner and head off for the Brewery Tour :-)

Making the most of the sunshine

Not only is this weekend a Bank Holiday weekend - it's a lovely sunny Saturday

So far, Saturday has been a lovely day - My boyfriend and I decided to make the most of it and rather than going to the coast (like the rest of the UK - the roads seemed absolutely packed!) we headed 'North-ish' and went to Painshill Park - somewhere we've never been, despite actually living relatively close to it. Good old Google - always good for finding things!

Before we got there, we visited another Farm Shop. We love Farm shops - I know it's more costly than food you can buy in the supermarket, however it's always incredibly good quality and there's something quite nice about finding new chutneys or different types of garlic you can cook with. This time, we were looking for braising steak as tonight we're making the Hairy Bikers low fat version of 'Beef and Ale casserole' - I can't wait! It's currently in the slow cooker and the kitchen smells amazing.

So - Painshill park. What an absolutely lovely place. It only cost £7.70 per person and we actually stayed there for about 2.5 hours which is loads of time for us. It's a beautiful 18th century landscaped garden and it was so relaxing which was perfect for me, as my mind is sadly still on work stresses, even at weekends :-(

We decided to do the 2.5 mile 'Historical' walk which took us past all the different folleys and architectural buildings - there was a Turkish tent, a ruined abbey, a cascade, a waterwheel and even a Gothic Tower! (Which sadly we weren't able to walk the 100 steps to the top as it was closed). The weather wasn't too bad, not as sunny as I'd like, however thankfully it wasn't raining and it was just so relaxing to walk round, talk.. get out and about really.

We even had some lunch in the cafe - Once again, I remained on track with my healthy eating, picking the thing which seemed the best choice. Jacket potato and beans! I haven't eaten 'normal' potato for ages as I always tend to prefer sweet potato (yams, if you're American!) It came with loads of beans and some salad. I was just about to tuck in, when I realised they had also put a lot of butter on it, without me asking - I decided to spoon it out and stick it on the side of my plate. Why? As I didn't need it and preferred to try and be as healthy as possible.

After the walk, we checked how many steps we've done today and it's very close to 10,000! Brill! :-) Very happy with that and far better to be out and about than staying in and watching TV.

If you're interested in going to Painshill, check out their website:

http://www.painshill.co.uk/

I think we'll definitely be going back, it was one of the loveliest parks we've been to in a long time - perfect for a long walk on a nice day.